I Care What You Think

So many times in just one day I read the words, I don't care what other people think.

This usually means that the person typing actually does care, because if they did not actually care they might not bother to spend time and emotional energy typing about it or even thinking about it.

I actually do care what other people think, but not in the same emotionally dependent way, perhaps.

I care what my friends think, I cherish their perspective and views and experiences. It may not change my mind or my view of the world, but I still value them and their thoughts. To say that I don't care what anyone thinks would be very disrespectful to all of those relationships.

It would be just as disrespectful to my community to hold back sharing my experiences and thoughts on things, especially if it helps someone else. I cannot fathom holding back my joy and sorrow just because one horrible anti-fan doesn't like what I am writing. Still, I also care about what they think, their experiences and perspectives and welcome all to share them here. Criticism has value too, though it is less irritating when it is respectfully carried out.

So I respectfully present you with rules for my blog:

1) If you ever disagree with me on anything I post, write, or say......tell me. I want to know your perspective. I value it. I am guessing that if you take the time to read what I am writing or be in my life, then you also value what I have to say and my experiences and my perspective.            

2) I will never delete your comments. I delete spam only. I don't even delete anonymous or mean or stupid haters. I really think that if someone decided to post some vile thing as a comment, it reflects on them not me and I find it to be so disrespectful of other readers to delete comments. Clearly we are all capable of making our own judgements and conversation can create real change Plus, I really think that people who "delete" comments and then discuss those so called comments are making it all up. I doubt anyone bothered to argue or comment at all ever. Either let us see the conversation unfold or it never happened. That's right. Never. Happened.

3) Share my posts, even if you disagree, even if your friends will bash what I have to say. If something I have written creates dialogue, then good.

4) If you see yourself in something I have written, ask me about it. If it is about you I will tell you, but 99% chances are that I already have and I have asked you if it is ok with you to write about.

5) I try very hard to ask permission to post pictures of other people that I take, but it usually only happens if my kid is also in the picture. If I post someone else's picture, I ask permission and give credit.

6) I do not elude to private conversations directly and bitch about them. Sometimes I will say that the topic has come up and write about it, but not directly bashing or quoting other people. That is disrespectful and wrong. It just is. On facebook or blogger, bashing people speaks to the bashers character and I don't want to be that person.

7) Share with me your research if you think it is relevant. I do not usually link to medical articles because links change and I prefer folks do their own research, but if you ask me I will send you what I have.  I really do spend a lot of time researching the topics I discuss - if you are curious just ask and I'll post the relevant information I used or tell you where I got the information from.


8) I love talking about my farm, my kids, and food. That's what this blog is all about: my perspective. So pretty much, I assume that if you don't want to read all about me and mine, you will go elsewhere on this huge and vast universe we call the Internet. No name calling needed. I happen to live an interesting, at least to me, life and I love writing. That's why I blog.

9) Ask me questions. Ask me anything, anytime. I will do my best to answer. Here's my email danelle@thestampsfamily.net

10) Everything here is public. So are my Instagram, Pinterest, and Facebook. I have nothing to hide. Privacy settings are pretty much useless and token anyway, better used for pretending to control gossip and rank friendship status. I think that is stupid and mean and very much not awesome.

11) If you say something mean, racist, or deliberately cruel? I will call you out on it. How you react speaks to your character, not mine. My character code requires that I speak up for disabled children, speak out against racist jokes, not tolerate animal cruelty, and that I speak up for marriage equality.  That is who I am. If you are friends with me or have been reading here for any amount of time, you'll know that soon enough.

So that's what you can expect here. Those are the rules of engagement.

Also this: xkcd

For the record, I don't mean these rules to apply to anyone else's blog. These rules are for me and my house, other bloggers have their own. I respect that. If something annoys me, I stop reading it. If I love something, I try and let people know.

A Litlle Downtime and Stormy Weather

Last week tornadoes and thunderstorms rolled through Iowa. When we heard this was in the forecast, we cancelled apple picking and planned for a downtime day.

The summer was full of perfect days, very little rain. Still, Lily has become a weather fanatic, watching radar and maps, paying attention to what animals and water and the wind does too. We have a fantastic southern view of the horizon, from east to west. She will sit and work on art while watching the storms roll in. Holly will watch too, but her interest lies in the planes and other sky craft that fly low when the storms move in. Isaac just stands at the window looking forlorn and sad about not going outside. His favourite place in a rain storm is at the tree fort under the shade canopy with his sisters.

The thing she is most excited about is packing the emergency bags. She loves packing. Loves packing for overnight, for going on a day trip, her fishing kit, her art bags.....organising and choosing items, getting it all to fit, just so.

Here is what she came up with when I asked her to pack what she thought we would need, no prompting:

First aid kit
Activity books
Diapers and wipes for Isaac
apples and mason jars full of cold water
a box of crackers
markers
our travel connect 4
head lamp flashlights
empty mason jars filled with tea lights and a lighter
2 blankets or towels
dvd player and charger
weather radio (is actually a walkie talkie with a weather radio built in. It picks up signal from others in the area too, so if we needed to call for help and the cell phone doesn't work, we have this method of signal too and....fresh batteries for it, taped too it, will be a good idea...must remember this)
phone charger (that's where the missing one is, Chad)

Compacted into two bags and set by the basement door.

We have not ever had to use them though. The summer before we bought the farmhouse a straight-line wind storm imploded the stone barn and took out several over out buildings. An architectural tragedy befell the farm. The ice house was a rare gem, now gone. Since then though, no severe storms or tornadoes have dared near our farm. Wind, yes. Rain, snow, ice, yes....but nothing that requires grabbing an emergency bag and hiding in the basement. We have not even had more than a power flicker since we've been on the farm. Our old neighbourhood still has days of power outages in the city....affecting those same neighbours that had warned us to expect worse in the rural landscape.

If that ever does happen, Lily is ready.

What's in your emergency, head to the basement bag?

Farm Crawl 2013

Whew.

That was a long day.

It rained and even ice slushed for a few minutes. It was cold. Wet, you know, from the raining.

Our tent wasn't set at the top correctly and leaked, pretty much right on my head.

We sold 200 packages of breakfast sausage. 8 jars of spice. A couple bags of bean mix. We ran out of business cards. We talked to folks about permaculture, Ossabaw Island pigs, milk and apple fed pork, bacon, soup making, recipes, gardening, and babywearing.

We grilled up sausage samples. We danced with our children in the rain.

It was a good day.

Our first farm crawl, in 2007, was when Lily was three years old. It was the best day. I was pregnant with Holly. I ate chevre for the first time. Lily picked apples. We saw a real beehive for the first time. Watched a kid rescue a wooly bear caterpillar from chickens. We lived in the city and were still longing for a farm. Longing is a soft word for it. We were suddenly brokenhearted at the thought of raising our children in the city. We needed this life.

In 2008 we toured farm crawl, meeting our soon to be neighbors and mentors.

2013, setting up our booth at Farm Crawl is still like a dream for us. I think the folks we were in 2007 imagined having a farm, but never having a vendor booth. We just wanted to do this for our own family. Now we teach others how to get started. That's pretty cool.

Through farm crawl we have met so many wonderful people. People from all over Iowa, people we have learned so much from, people we pass knowledge on to.

I am so grateful.

Sadly we didn't get a single picture.

Farm Crawl and New Blog Navigation

Today was the annual Farm Crawl. We've been preparing all week and very busy.

For those of you new to the blog there is a navigation tab system at the top. If you just want recipes, click on the Farmhouse Kitchen. If you only want to read about Isaac's story, and how our family lives with 22q deletion syndrome there is a tab for that too.

This blog includes all of our life, the farm, the kids, unschooling, cooking, motherhood reflections, writing about writing, and sometimes long rambling posts about body politics and feminism. That's just who I am, what I love, and I write about it. I write about all of it.

I thought about making multiple topic blogs but ultimately decided that the model of that didn't work for me. That's why you get it all here. The good, the yummy, and the barnyard.

Cheers!