Birthday Parties Part 2

My birthday, 31st, is this week.

What does this mean to me exactly? Nada. I don't measure age by chronological years, but ability, experience, and readiness. This quirk of mine is really getting me in trouble when I try to sign Lil'Bug up for stuff to do locally. They go by birthdays. Period. Bah and unfair. There was a preschool we once considered because they set their admission criteria by ability and not age. She was ready for enrollment at a little less than 2 (potty training, walking, language skills were all included in the criteria). Still, I was unsure that it was the right place for her even if it was more right than other places.

We all gain understanding and experience at different time from different things, why does a yearly marker matter so much? Why is it so important that so and so is 5 and her friend is 12? Obviously, there are unhealthy relationships at all ages and, as parents, we have to be careful about some friendship parings but overall there are times when multi age groups are ideal and healthier than age segregation.

So, back to the birthday thing. I usually forgo parties and revelry for a quiet night at home. Presents at our house are given year round, as delight driven instead of event driven (though we do still do major holidays for kid and others). Birthdays growing up for me were complicated, as I was an odd duck at school, parties were either parents did the inviting or no one showed up. Neither was pleasant. I didn't even go to my sweet 16 because I was not even asked who to invite and no one on the guest list was anyone I knew. It wasn't about me. I'm not really a party person anyway, the noise freaks me out a little (image crowded mall at Christmastime effect).

I bought myself a gift this year, a necklace. Husband replaced some small kitchen stuff for me and we bought a Wii. So it feels like I am rolling in new stuff without having a big to do. My favorite birthday ever was the trip to Lincoln we took in 1998 where Dearest Husband bought my wedding ring from an antique store in the Haymarket district. He gave it to me then as a birthday present, promising to propose later. His reasoning was that I could keep it if something happened, where just an engagement ring has to be returned. Also, he wasn't ready to propose yet. I was cool with that, sort of. It all worked out. My other favorite birthday was my 28th, when Lil'Bug was just a babe. We stayed at home. New baby cuddled with me on the couch. Lovely.

This year, we are just too busy to do anything at all for birthday. We have stuff to do- doctor appointments, play dates, swimming time, field trips- every single day of the week. I actually love busy weeks, since they feel like more gets done and with us out so much, the house stays tidier.

Today we are of to an unschoolers open house/freecycle day, then a craft activity at the library, and after that Lil'Bug goes to grandma's while we head to Bradley class. Yippee!