I think I have it. After a lovely playdate yesterday and then some quiet reflection time, I contemplated something LIfedreamed said about how she does birthday parties: only big parties for the bigger birthdays, like 5 and 10.
Hmmm. I thought. No one else in our family celebrates with a big party unless it is a BIG milestone, then no one else is under 5 either. :) We don't do cakes, we do eat out and maybe splurge on dessert. We do a thoughtful gift or two.
Her birthday does fall on a park day.....
So last night Dearest Husband and I talked about it and decided.........
Drumroll please.....
We will bring healthy cupcakes to park day. We will stay late and grill dinner. Hopefully family can join us after work. I will let Lil'Bug wear whatever dress/cape/superhero hat she wants too. (Well, she does that anyway....)
If it rains or is waaaaaay too cold, then we will probably go to the Science Center AND we will remember to tell people of our plans. I don't mean a Science Center birthday party....just friends meeting up there. We can eat cupcakes in the cafeteria. No big deal. Just friends. She's always delighted when we run into friends at the places we visit. Then we will go out to eat with family.
I know, I know......cheating her out of some mandated cultural norm. Some families throw big parties for every member, complete with cake, mixed drinks, and lots of rowdy family/friend fun. That's just not us. I think if we did it for just her it would imbalance the harmony of our family. We can make her feel special in ways that fit with how we live our life. I hope I make her feel special and loved everyday.
When she turns 5 maybe something different.
You know after you mentioned it, my parents always took us out (there were four of us) by ourselves when we were kids for our birthdays, to wherever we wanted. I loved it, and always felt special. I think it probably works better as kids get a little older, but we took Liv out to eat for hers by ourselves (then later joined by my mom and sister) and she enjoyed it-especially since we went Mexican so they sang to her and let her wear a sombrero. I think we all enjoyed that more than gads of folks, even if it was an family only party this time. And cultural norms be darned. Who needs them. She won't know the difference. Just needs to know she's loved, which we all know she is!
ReplyDeleteThat's what we did last year, but there were unexpected guests and it got chaotic. Chaotic is ok at park day AND most of her friends go to it anyway!
ReplyDeleteThat's a great idea...long ago we got sucked into the "normal" birthday thing, and every year we say we're going to stop doing the party thing, and then have guilt because we did a party for whichever kid last had one and that wouldn't be fair, blah, blah, blah...Now the kids expect it. And it gets more expensive as they get older, want more, have more friends, etc, even just doing cake at home.
ReplyDeleteshe'll have a blast! with a reminder before hand K and i'll even make it to park day that day (or the science center).
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