There is a new playscape at a local park. It is made from all natural materials and is basically just kid friendly landscaping. No slides. No swings.
And yet.....my kid will spend hours there. She's never once come home from there dry. She asks to go there over any other park right now. If it wasn't 35 minutes away, we'd go more often.
When we move, we will be 45 minutes away from Des Moines and all of its fancy playgrounds. Sure, we'll build the girls a swing set and slide, but it is not the same thing. We will have lots of wooded and marsh landscape to explore. The fact that Lil'Bug favors the natural eases my worry quite a bit.
Looking at the pictures I took that afternoon..... I think that if we ever did coming of age portraits..... we'll have to incorporate mud or puddles.
Anyway, I've been mulling this over lately. Which is better: natural or equipped? When we go to park day, Lil'Bug plays on the equipment for a bit off and on, but the majority of her time is divided between the trees, one of which she calls her house. I know I am over thinking this, but it started to form a huge metaphor for me about unschooling vs homeschooling-school-at-home-model vs the extreme counterpart of public/institutionalized schooling.
The playgrounds are sparse (sometimes empty, but not usually) most of the year and have kids of various ages. We homeschoolers like to descend upon the parks during the "school" day. We often stay there for a long time and inevitably a few PS kids get there later in our play. We are not secluded from them (read as: we are not "unsocial" and yes, that is as much I will address the S word), just well established in our games when the arrive and still playing when they leave. For us, it is like summer never ends.
We have the flexibility to play and learn and run for as long as needed, to come back to the game later, to jump and climb and get dirty until we fall asleep exhausted in the grass. We have less of the time constraint of bells and appointments and lessons that dictate play time for most families.
Water is not off limits. Nor is mud. Or fire for that matter. Because we have the time to build a fire and stay with it and doing so is a normal natural thing, none of the kids we play with are fire obsessed and they all treat it with respect. Not to say that they are not roasted/burned marshmallow obsessed though. I know, these are not elements that most mainstream families consider a normal part of going to the park. Well, most things we do as unschoolers are not considered normal. I can live with that.
The equipment. Playgrounds are equipped. There is some variation, but you can expect some sort of swings, slides, and maybe a tunnel thing. These are the basics. If these are not present, the playground is typically judged as not good by kids and caregivers. Sometimes it is not even considered a playground by kids or adults. That is where I challenge the norm. Play/learning can happen anywhere at anytime. One does not need a slide to have fun, or a swing to reach the sky. Sure it is "easier" for the kids to run to the presubscribed equipment, sure they learn to take turns and share, they get the "right" kind of exercise. Sure. But is it better? Is that the only, or even the main kind of play that we should provide them? Is it easier because we can sit on the benches and let them play? Maybe help them on the slide when they get stuck, or push the swings for a bit? Or let them tough it out.
Maybe. For us the joy is in participating in our kids life, playing and learning. It is nice to have swings and slides but for us the boat, the camp fire, the bugs in the dirt, the puddles, the garden, the trees, the sky, the air....well, really, life are the better tools for our play and learning all day every day. Not just after the swings and slides, and on weekends.
Now imagine if all you had was swings and slides. Imagine that it wa sall you were allowed five days a week, 7 hours a day. Would your play suffer? Not at first, but eventually. Even if you got to move up to a more complex swing and slide compound it would still be limited to what was being offered. Sure, after hours and on weekends you could visit other places, but is that the same? You still have to go back to the same playground when the week starts up again. What social skills are you really learning playing with the same kids day after day after day? Sure that's like some real life jobs, but not all. Even if you decide to install a swing and slide set in your backyard, it is still just swings and a slide.
My kids run to me when they get hurt, unless they can't, but then I am nearby enough to help and nurture. Most of the time they work it out. The other day one of the kids (age four) was caught upside down in a tree. The three of them quickly assigned roles, one (age five) ran to get the mamas, the other (my Lil'Bug) stayed and held the stuck one so she wouldn't fall more AND comforted her. A small crisis handled well. I know adults who can not act as level headed in crisis. When it was done, they returned to play un-traumatized.
So is my metaphor clear? I don't know. I just was thinking about this all week. A friend of ours brought up the socialization issue in polite conversation. It really hit home with me that she just doesn't get it. It was also said that my kids are not old enough to homeschool. See? Doesn't get it.
The playgrounds may have lots of swings and slides, complicated and varied equipment, even trees and water features, and and and. Some playgrounds are far superior to others for many types of play. Some are not. Some have broken toys, drug paraphernalia littering the sand, etc. In some places you can't choose which playground you get to use. Some playgrounds don't have safe or good foundations or are infested with bugs. Some flood often. Some are great, clean, and safe. We like to use those, as a tool, not a default.
So in short, my conclusion is simple. Neither is better, it is all about the options, yo. The more there are the better.
Though I don't want to be a person who looks for reasons to be offended, the whole "you're not a hser until your children are xx age" irritates me.
ReplyDeleteEspecially because to some of us (say, you and I) it's not about where one does one's Formal (required by law) Training, it's a way of life.
It's the Everything.
I like it, 'Playground Philosophy';) Mother nature is OUR playground - it is life - and try as we may, it can never be substituted. I think the core of your home schooling principles are something that any parent should be applying... that is, simply being involved in our kids lives, every moment as is possible - there is so much wonder in it for us and them - in not only the big moments, but also and most certainly in the seemingly small ones too.
ReplyDeleteI honestly was disappointed at the size of the playscape. I think the grass maze should have been wider. And I was expecting more logs for kids to play on. But otherwise it is nice! We found our own little piece of heaven nearer to us. I am bored of man made parks. It's about the trees. Lately, I've been interested in old trees with weird shapes and knobs.
ReplyDelete:)
look at soule mama's blog -- the banging wall.
ReplyDeleteWe built a great play area with swings, hanging bars, monkey bars, etc. but the kids rarely play there. Where they hang out the most is in the huge cedar tree in the same play area- the kids and the Dude have built an amazing tree house that all the neighborhood kids love, but I swear- it is the tree itself that is the draw, and the center of all their play.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I do love is that my kids still play a great deal- few teens we know will still engage in imaginary play the way mine will- I love that they have that freedom.
LB
What social skills are you really learning playing with the same kids day after day after day?
ReplyDeleteWow, that is wisdom. As an adult and forever kid, a great reminder. Thank you universe that we have so many choices if we would just wake up and make them, authentically, for our selves.
Thanks for sharing,
Pamela
PS I've been to Needelroozer's, and played with her kids for years. They have made me, and some of my family and friends, fans of intelligently HS'd kids and people!