Birth Story In Detail

Then things began to get complicated. Seriously, I was in labour for two weeks if not more. Something called predromal labour. Good times that. Two false alarms at the hospital, contractions 6 minutes apart at almost full strength for 14 days. The last 3 days things kicked up a notch. The pain was so bad I was throwing up and shaking so we went in to the hospital yet again on Tuesday.

We checked in and I was 1 centimeter, 50 percent effaced. I wanted to go home, since that is nothing. The doc came in to check 30 minutes later- 3 centimeters, 85% effaced. ???? Also, yay! 1 hour later I was 5 centimeters and 100%, and labouring in a birth suite. Sweet.

Then the pain jacked up another notch. My contractions were still 6 minutes apart and "abnormal", as in the peaked immediately and then took 90 second more to ease off (though to say they eased off is weird). In between, my whole body was wracked with pain and I started vomiting again. 5 hours later........no progress, still at a 5.

My birth team, including my doula, discussed and suggested an epidural, so I could rest and maybe my body would relax enough to normalize the contractions. The baby was not descending and that was why my labour was stalled. Maybe if I would relax then we could get into other positions that would realign her head position to descend? So we tried. The epidural too three tries to get in right, but then it was such sweet relief.

4 hours after that, my water was broken. Thick green meconium was present, which means the baby was in distress and pooped. My dilation was 4.5 and effacement was 90%. Part of my cervix was swollen AND I started running a fever.

The doctor suggested pitocin to again try and speed up the labour since we were now at risk. I reacted poorly to pitocin last time AND it increases the risk of uterine rupture in VBACs.

He offered us two choices, wait and let time pass to see if we would progress (baby's heartrate was still good) OR have C-section. If the baby went into distress they would knock me out and do a CS anyway. It was nice to have a choice. It was good to be reassured that the baby was still doing well and that the choices were still all ours.

Still, I was educated. I knew that my fever and the very dark, muddy amniotic fluid was bad news. I am a mother above all and my baby needed me.

With the epidural in place already, I was ready for surgery. The thing is, the epidural only turns down the volume of the pain. I could still feel pain plus the narcotics added made me unable to move my arms or neck or face. I felt like I couldn't breathe. This was very unlike my first c-section where I could hold my husband's hand and look at my new baby. I couldn't open my eyes.

Good thing too. Holly couldn't breathe for 3.5 minutes after she was born. I can't imagine the possible outcomes if I had waited or delayed my decision. The NICU team was awesome.

My dear husband was traumatized.

I shook too hard in the hours after her birth to hold her or breastfeed her. I will grieve for that time lost, but that is all.

Every single one of my docs said that my attempt was heroic and really good. Through the whole thing they were supportive and respectful of my choices and needs.

Plus, even though the actual labour was gruelling and the surgery hellish (due to the type of anesthesia) , my recovery was been awesome. I am still taking it slow, but I am still present for my family.