Holiday Madness and Joy

The holidays are strange things, especially in our American culture. We create these coming togethers, a good thing in theory, but then we blow that up. For many people it becomes an explosion of showing everyone what you have, what you do, what you are better at. Birthday parties become circuses with the guests getting gifts, Thanksgiving has so much stress and family drama that people opt to work to get out of it, Christmas is such a mess that people actually get killed fighting over toys on Black Friday.

Goodness. What have we done to ourselves.

Good can come from this though. A few years back the family decided that Christmas would be at the farm. This decision was made in October, plenty of time, right? I had an 11 month old special needs baby and we had finally moved the rest of our crap out of our city house (a house 2x the square footage) to the farm. I was teaching seven sections that term.  Everything was chaos and I was burned out.

That year, I hired a company called Jess Marie Services to help me sort through the chaos that was both in my head and in my house. For three months we cleaned and sorted and hauled out junk once a week. Then she started tackling the small house things like painting and hanging pictures and painting the mural on my kids wall. And talking me through a lot of my anxieties. Christmas at the farm was cancelled that year anyway, but we were ready. And I gave myself the gift of budgeting for Jessica for the whole freaking year. She'd come, reboot the whole house, tackle a project with me, and be gone just after lunch. This helped me regain the footing I needed in my own life. 

Fast forward to this year: My awesome, amazing aunt decided to spend Thanksgiving at the farm.Of course, this is the aunt that I take after.....she forgot to tell me of her plans and I found out a couple days ago from another family member.

My plans had been to sulk around in my pajamas all day eating frozen pizza and watching cheesy Christmas movies. Kids approved of this plan. Well, junk those plans....DEEDLE IS COMING FROM TEXAS! (Deedle is her family nickname from when she saved my baby sister from dying of an accidental drug overdose of grandmas heart medication.....one of many family legends).

There was no freaking out this time, no rush to clean everything to perfection. Instead? I first called Jessica. Ha. She came and rebooted the house. See?

Then I invited friends and family to come too. The more the merrier.

I used Pinterest to build a menu. I will link to that or make another post in just a bit. I have to finish sorting out the details. Basically, I am making a kick ass main dish that is more traditionally true to historic American cuisine than a turkey would be. Side dishes will be simple and classic and whatever guests bring too.

Oh and the pie! The pie will be a tribute to my first foodie love: pumpkin, apple, peach, and cream cheese pecan. I love pie. The more pies the better. Yay pie! Also, pies are easy as pie. I can whip up these in about 20 minutes of prep and cook them all at once.

We'll pick up the tree Wednesday and decorated it Friday while we have a Cajun catfish fry and rock out to Zydeco Holiday music.

It doesn't matter if my house is magazine ready. I don't have to have a picture perfect spread. All I need is a big table and my family. We'll get out the really good dishes and we'll make some really good memories.

How far I have come, y'all.

Cheers.

* One last thought though. If the holidays suck, that's ok. If pajamas and frozen pizza are what get you through? Do it. If working a double shift is better than drowning in old family grudges and drunken emotional breakdowns/rants/attacks? Do it. Do what you need to do. Pretending to be joyful and making postcard perfect memories does not bring you closer to Jesus, breaking emotionally does not bring others to Christ, and destroying your own mental health for the happiness of others is not your job/obligation/role. Be kind to yourself. Be kind to others who might be struggling. Go gently into the holiday. If you have to wade into a dysfunctional mess, know that what they say and think about you reflects more about them and their character than it does you. Hang in there.