Selfies and Gypsy Farm Girl Punk

A couple years back my friend and inspiration Tiffany posted a selfie challenge. I started it. The one post I wrote sat gathering dust in my draft folder taunting me for near two years.

I could not even bear to look at myself in a mirror, let alone publish a picture of myself. Good grief. I gave a family member a whole lotta grief over flooding her wall with glamour shot and drunk selfies near daily. That's one extreme and my zero selfie policy was the other.

I wanted to find a healthy balance. First, I published that draft. Goodness it was well received, shared on social media about 200 times. Not the picture, the message. We are all superheros.

Still, I was in full on mama frumpy fashion and felt like a blurred out version of what might have been instead of a full person who is. How to even begin to address that?

Step one: decide what your style is. I used Polyvore.com to help me figure this out. For casual work days my style is Gypsy Bohemian- long skirts, chunky vintage jewelry, tall boots, and blouses. For farm days- jeans and punk rock t's or a cross over with the gypsy blouses. For dress up? Rockabilly vintage.

gypsy farm girl by danelle-stamps featuring a black skirt

Purple or red for hair no matter what. And earrings. I realised I love earrings. Just putting a pair on makes me feel prettier.

Once I figured that out, then I had to force myself to shop for myself. I started online, easier to do with kids constantly pulling at me. Then thrift shops. Most of my jewellery is vintage or handmade from friends.

Another bigger hurdle? I mean, other than budget? Ha. Buying clothes that fit me, buying clothes for my right now body not the maybe someday body. That means admitting I need size 10 bottoms and large tops. I will never again be a zero or a two or shop the small rack. I am ok with that.

Then, learning how to put things together with things I already have or to remember what things work with what. Polyvore helped with that too.

Here is what the result was Saturday night at the show (I was trapped in the bathroom with Isaac who was melting down from the over stimulation):

My goal now is to take a selfie a day. Sometimes that means I wll take one out in the pasture or with an arm full of kids or while cooking something fun. I am part of the story too. Not just the faceless narrator, leading others to beauty and self acceptance and adventure.

I am part of the story too.

More to come on this topic I am sure. Just you wait and see.

The Damfinos

A few months ago, I noticed a post from a friend about her husband's band needing a drummer. I passed it on to Chad after finding out it was a punk cover band.

They actually knew us from our movie theatre days and despite that......Chad became their new drummer! Ha.

It has meant time away from the family, shifting my grading time schedule, and the fuss of breaking down his drum set and hauling it every single week.....but it is totally, completely, worth it.

Last night was their first show. They are really, really good. Chad did a drum solo no one in the audience expected and got his own round of applause. The kids were so enamoured and supportive. YAY DADDY! It was hot being the wife of the drummer. ;) I got to play with my camera in low lighting too. Next time they have a show, I'll be there. Front row.

Chad and I support each others' interests. There is give and take, but we do our best. Up till recently, Chad has done the majority of the supporting of my crazy whims. This was his turn in the spotlight. It was awesome.

Lucas County Fair, Clover Kids

The Calm Between Adventures

This summer has been unusually cool and the wind has been calm as well. There are very few ticks or mosquitoes, and the humidity is just about perfect.

We have not yet needed our AC turned on, a good thing since it is broken. *Note to self, remember to get a call in about that or bug Chad before winter gets here. **I'll forget anyway. Ha.

Isaac loves it. He loves sitting outside eating apples and cuddling chickens and chasing his sisters and counting clouds....one, two, three, four, five.....

Holly has been taking crayons outside and today I found her masterpiece, in crayon wax, on the front porch floor. It is pretty amazing actually.

Lily, ever the farm girl, has been taking care of her chores and heading out to the woods for explores. They stay out late, until bedtime, negotiating meals (ONLY COMING IN IF SOUP IS FOR DINNER!) Soup. Huh. I can do soup.

Chad and I have been taking walks in the late afternoon and evenings and dreaming pretty big about things. Lots of things. Finding thornless honey locust on our farm is pretty cool. Snacking on mulberries is lovely too. We talked about what time I need to do my job that is with the college and what I need to keep going with my freelance work. I have a list of places to submit work about farm life that I am researching. I have ideas for travel pieces.

The air feels too cool for July though. Winter teasing us. We bought this winter's hay and had it delivered today. Next up, chop and stack firewood. Try for enough for winter. Find a better place to stack and store it.

I have been furiously scribbling in my notebooks, learning formal verse form, then trashing it and wrecking all the rules. That's kind of my signature style, rule breaking. My intentions are to study the form and then dance around the edges, tearing at the border with my heals and tempo. Wild with pulpiness and red lines and life.

When I am done, good and worn out, I sway on the porch swing, sweet tea nearby, one ear out for duckings and another on the humming of children plotting their own way, book of verse in hand, reading poems about house fires in Tennessee, marsh whores in Florida, and urban schoolteachers falling in love.

This is my summer. This is my view. This is the calm between adventures.