Night Eyes, Isaac's First

Lily's Night Out

Lily is getting to be so much more muchier. She helps more, she talks more, she does more. Everything is so much more.

Every week she and I take an art class together. This one on one time has been great for us, so much so that we decided that one other night each week we should take a walk together or take the boat out at dusk. We have had lovely talks. This week she asked if I could help her create a vlog for her to narrate and demonstrate certain tasks for other kids. She wants to start with how to tie a hook on a line, choose a worm, and fish for catfish. Cool idea, eh? Look for that soon.

With responsibility comes privilege and slowly we are figuring this part out too.

I am so glad I get to spend my days with her. She is such a neat kid with big ideas and dreams and imagination! At art class we were asked to make dessert sculptures. Everyone made cupcakes, pies, cake slices, cookies......Lily made a bowl of pudding and added snails to it. That's my girl.

She's always thinking and doing her own thing. She's got that spark and does not see the need to conform to what the other kids at the table are doing. How do I preserve and protect that gift? Nurture it? That question keeps me up at night.

She also asked to take over washing lunch dishes. Yes! Score! However, she'll only do them on her terms. She has to sit on the counter and she wants to use the sink full of soapy water method, not the always running hot water method I use. She says that I am wasting water. True.

Lily is a complicated girl though, she feels so much more love and passion and so much more anger when she's mad. She is a five alarm fire, like this song goes.

Soon she will be nine. I have had her in my heart nearly all my life. She is my dream come true, my prayers answered. Lily is the child that taught me to be a mother and continues to teach me everyday.

I look forward to celebrating nine with her, baking her a peach pie and making soup for dinner. I look forward to reading books, making art, and singing loudly in the car. This year she wants to learn cartography and navigation. Easy enough!

 I still have not figured out the special gift from mama that I give her every year. Suggestions welcome!

Sample Sunday

Lily has leveled up. She is my new partner at booth for markets.

Today she took over grill duties. She grilled the links, checked for doneness,  cut them up (with scissors), toothpicked, and then walked around talking to folks while offering samples. That was all we discussed her doing, it was her idea.

I step away for a moment and come back to her taking money, making change, and packaging product. We have never once done formal math lessons with her, she made correct change. We had friends at neighbouring booths keeping on eye on her, so I wasn't worried, but I did not expect her to take on this part of running the booth!

Proud mama, but more important that how I feel about it.....proud of herself Lily.

 

She prefers to have her own product though. She was very clear about this on our drive home. I love doing this with her, the one on one time we get. I was sad when she fell asleep with an hour left to drive home, because she is a very lovely companion and storyteller. 

This is my Lily. Bright and effervescent, strong willed and confident. This child made me a mother and makes me earn that title every day, gladly.

I shared a story with guests to our farm yesterday that I realised I never shared here, at least not that I could find in the archive search. 2 summers ago Lily went to and was kicked out of her first 4H day camp. I was very proud of her that day.

Wait? What?

That's right.  I was proud of her.

Enthusiastic belligerence is what they informed me when I picked her up.

She was rude to the teacher, that was wrong. But Mama, she was rude to all of us telling us wrong things! Wrong things about food!
That's my girl. She stood her ground when the teacher told them to choose fat free options. Human bodies NEED fat to use vitamins. Also the term chemical shitstorm may have been used. She refused to eat the veggies and fruits from China, because that country cannot be counted on for safe gardening and not spray poison. She was/is right.

Then when the teacher told them they should eat less meat, only 3 times a week, Lily asked, You mean 3 times a day, right? Because 3 out of 21 meals? Who is this lady? The camp tried to serve a vegetarian lunch. Guess how that went? Yeah. Lily refused to eat and warned them she gets cranky without protein in a meal. Yes. She did.

Lily never backed down. Lily stands her ground. That will serve her well in life if she can polish that skill, so far she is really blooming and growing, understanding better how to politely refuse and politely educate and be a light in the world sharing what we know and live.

Shiny. My shiny Lily. She was 6 at the time.

*She did later apologise for being rude to the teacher, but never once apologised for the content of her words. I am so proud of her. How hard it is for a child to stand up to adults, in front of peers that she really wants to like and accept her, to not back down? That is a life skill. Think about it. This child, if we nurture instead of oppress, will never have the experience of regretting not saying something, of not standing up for herself. How often I sit in my car in tears and then eureka think of the perfect thing to have said, after the moment is lost. This leader, this sassy wonderful child, will not suffer like that if we are careful to keep this spark alive in her.

What do you think? Have you ever had to stand up for something you knew to be factually correct in the face of authority telling you and others something else? Under the pressure of peers?

Bottle Calf!

Sorry for missing a day, I've been writing furiously on a post about immunity management for our 22q series, but I keep remembering things to add to it.

In the mean time, twice a day I have to wash bottles and make formula......for a red angus baby heifer calf. She's Lily's bottle calf, to show for Clover Kids at the county fair. We'll raise her up and keep her for breeding or trade her back to the ranch for a beef steer. We'll see. Susan Maribelle Test Red Stamps is growing on us. She's a sweetie.

You know aside from the dreaded cow spit kisses and Lily getting it into her head that Susan can suck her eyeballs out. Lily gets up early and forgoes some evening activities to manage the electric fence, make sure she has water, and feed her the bottles twice a day. It is a big responsibility, but she wants to do it.

When you give a kid a responsibility they ask for and set them up for success, then they often surprise us with how capable they are.

We all have our part in this project. Lily feeds the bottle, I do the dishes and mix the milk, Holly keeps Lily company and is emergency watch (if the cow hurts Lily or Lily needs me ASAP, Holly is the runner).

Making Time for Each Child

In a special needs family the child with extra medical needs gets a lot of the attention. It is already a difficult task to balance each child's needs and individual relationships but when a child that demands extra time and attention because of real medical needs the entire balance is thrown up into the air.

We have 3 children. They each have needs, even if they are not medical. It is all about relationship.

Now that we have lived our way through a transition, we can redirect and make sure each child gets their needs met. Homeschooling really helps with this dynamic. Special moments can be caught on the wind and held for a moment, sometimes it is while washing dishes or at bedtime, or while one is running full speed on the way to deliver swiped Popsicles to her siblings.

I love you. I love watching you play.

I love watching my children fall in love with the art of their choice. For Lily it is clay work. So much clay work. We are taking mother daughter classes together at a local art studio. I am terrible at pots but I a fiercely good at loving Lily. Lily told me that she dreams of having her own studio and decided not to rent one in the building. No, she wants the whole building and she'll rent to others. Ah, my little dreamer.

For Holly it is ballet. The first time she walked into the studio, her foot touched the hard wood floors, she lit up like I have never seen before. That enthusiasm has never once waned. She LOVES ballet. Everyday. Always. Loves.

At her recital she was a ham. At the end of her class's dance she walked out to the front of the stage for a special, only Holly, with flourish bow. Because of course, she was the star ballerina in her mind. That is what she saw the lead ballerina do at the Nutcracker.

I read to her and cuddle her every chance I get.

Isaac is still letting us know what he loves. Apples. Climbing. Playing his piano. Cuddling mama.

I know these things will change and evolve. I will be here for all of it. Right here. Loving every moment, every smile, the stolen glances, the goofiness and joy. I will tell them how much joy they bring me just being in my life. I will nourish their relationships with us and with each other.

I have witnessed such tenderness that my heart has burst into tears. These people have made my life better by just being in it. Why should I hold back telling them that every single day that I am able to?

It gets complicated. Complicated to work, take care of a home, take care of their physical needs and on top of that nurture them and their passions. I prioritize. Housework, beyond basics, come last. I actually pay for someone to help me get to that. My work is online and I make the schedule around the kids and their appointments. Prioritize.

On top of all of that I make time for them. Daddy daughter night, Mama takes one kid to tea, firefly walks with flashlights with just one kid. Ballet camp and class allows me to connect with the child not in class. We talk. They take turns helping me with dishes and I tell them our heritage stories so they know the magic that they have been born out of.  I make time.

I value the outputs of their passions too. Holly's dance pictures are framed. Lily's ceramics get used. All three children have their art framed and hung up in public view. 

I value the things they make and that matters. Some houses you walk into and you know they have children but there is no evidence of children. In our home, there is mess and chaos and you KNOW we have children the minute you pull up in our drive. Our house is filled with love and joy and the joyful noise that comes with a happy, vibrant childhood. Part of that is also that we have a full range of musical instruments, both real and toys, accessible to the children.

We live a different life. I understand that. Different does not mean bad though, it means magical. When they are honoured as individuals and humans in the world, it becomes less of a challenge to make time for them or for ourselves. We are always true to what we are. They see that.

Last month Lily had a friend over and we asked her if she planned on staying up all night and complaining about her parents. She looked at us confused. Later she asked about what I had said to her. Do kids really do that? I brought them a snack and heard her telling her friend about all the amazing adventures we have and then saw me and instead of clamming up, she asked me to join their conversation.

I know it won't always be like this. Maybe? I hope that nothing ever dulls the shine of joy and curiosity from their eyes. That is my priority: to feed their faith, their curiosity, their love for each other. When that is the goal and we put all we have into that, then time is made. Time is cherished. Time slips by way too fast. I also try and make time together special so they see me honour each of them, so it is not a competition.

I try and bring the children, all the children, to at least some of Isaac's appointments. We don't hide his needs from them. Sometimes it can be scary. The reason is that if something happens to us, the parents, even in their adulthood, they will still have each other. I want them to have the kind of relationship that this is a natural part of their lives, that they would welcome it. We don't know if Isaac will be able to be independent. Right now it looks like he will. Anything can happen to any of them between now and the unforeseen future. If we make time for them, will they make time for each other later?

It is all about relationship. 

Preface/Background to Our Chinese Unit Study, Unschool Style, plus an introduction to newbies to "strewing".....

We homeschool. We unschool as a philosophical approach. For those who are unfamiliar with that term, it is like Montessori without the large class management of other people's children aspect.

Our classroom is our home, our farm, our community- you get the idea. Our home is filled with books, seriously thousands of books. No less than three bookcases hold "kid" books, the rest are all over- history, science, literature, classics, antiques, newest editions, science fiction. We love books.

In our dining room, at kid level, I have art supplies. I do keep the higher quality paints and inks up high but only so Zap doesn't eat them and Holly doesn't take up Interior decorating- again. They can have them down when they ask, just not when I am in the shower or on the phone. You know? This.

I have a whole huge bookcase with kid history, math, and reading books. Whole curricula..

"Hold up, lady, you just said you unschool!" Yes I did. That doesn't mean we don't learn things or enjoy using books. We all do. Especially me.

That's where something called strewing comes into play. Strewing is where we make available items of interest and leave them in accessible places to be found and explored at will.

So I thought about how we will handle school this year, since I am going back to work away from home a couple days a week and fall is pretty busy with deliveries and craziness of farm stuff. My kids have been begging to learn more about China, love Chinese food, music, and art. We've also fielded some questions from them about why we don't buy Made in China products (we actually do though), especially packaged food and art supplies (which end up as food unintentionally toddler style). A really negative bias has crept up in our whole culture regarding products from China, mostly from teh massive lead poisoning issues that have happened. Plus we like to buy local, as local as possible in all things. But that doesn't mean we have to bash a whole culture, you know?

And I realized too that I know very little about China. I mean, I have seen Mulan a million times with the kids, and I know I like crab Rangoon, and I can point to China on the map....and that's about it really.

So what better way to organize our lives and learning than to have mama learn some more about China? And that's how we'll do this, I will learn and do projects and if they are interested then they can too. I plan on creating a syllabus, with books and supplies provided for each mini lesson, here on the blog, in case anyone wants to replicate what we are doing. Label will be China, Dragons, and Yummies.

A brief summary of items we will cover in the groupings:

Art: watercolor, calligraphy, kite making, origami, paper making
Culture: Tea ceremonies, religion, etiquette, medicine, agriculture, puppetry
History: Time lines
Geography and cooking are paired. We'll study regional cuisines and cook them every week, in reference to regions and types of ingredients. Food can really be a good way to teach other aspects of culture. Plus, YUMMY. Oh, and animals. Geography=animals to my kids. Maybe a zoo trip.
Science: inventions, building, medicine, agriculture, earthquakes
Math: fractions in cooking, calculating for science, abacus, money measuring, weighing
Reading: stories and books from China, about China, writing to a pen pal, writing messages in cards, creating fortune cookie messages, calligraphy
Dragons. My kids like dragons a lot.
Chinese New Year and holidays.
We plan on attending the Asian Festival here this year too.

Things I have purchased so far:

• A calligraphy set, a real one with ink and stone and hair brushes and bone chine dishes. Not expensive and yes, made in China.
• Toy dragons. Yes I did.
• Paper dragons to hang from the ceiling.
• Real stainless steel chopsticks and bone china spoons
• Cast iron tea service
• Tea
• Books on calligraphy, craft and building projects, books on Chinese history for kids, Chinese mask book
• Pandora, Traditional Chinese station
• Netflix, Wild China and Studio Gibli movies. Dress up clothes with Chinese theme.

We'll start this October 1st ish. Expect lots of cute pictures of kids doing stuff and cooking. These items are on the shelves and ready to explore. We already listen to the music every day. At the end of the week, we'll have lunch at the local Chinese buffet (yay rural Iowa!). We'll cook from the recipe books twice a week, maybe more at lunch time.

Each time we do an activity, I will post book and supply list with links to Amazon.com isbns, mostly because that is where I shopped for the stuff.  I'll also post a reflection on what worked, ect.

I'd love additional ideas to work in too.....and that's about all of it. The ideas of it all will unfold as we live it. The girls want to trade out our dining room table for a lower standing coffee table so we have to sit on pillows to eat meals. Is that even how people eat in China? Where did they get that idea?

Happy Birthday to my not so little Lil'Bug

Happy 6th birthday my baby girl. I love you more than you will ever know.

Dancing Queen

Last week we visited the DM farmer's market. We did two weeks worth of grocery shopping, fancy cheese included and left with loaded bags. On the way out Lil'Bug sees a guy with a cool guitar and a neat drum and asks please to go dance please! Of course!

Thank you Chris for sending me this link, she is indeed our dancing queen. :)

I've not been blogging, it's true. I apologize. Grades are in and half the garden in the ground. Perhaps I shall find time again. ;)

I have a couple hundred photos to sort and post too which will hopefully come this week.

In other news, despite my insane business, I managed to get something started that I've wanted to do for a while: Simply Food, Nothing Extra. I'm still gathering up local foodies so if you know any, send me a note. I've been reading Iowa mom and farm blogs and there are so many incredible recipes and ideas, all which helped me on my quest to better eating for my family. So why not gather them all up? It is finally out there, beautifully designed by Diana and starting to fill up with incredible recipes. :) Check it out!

We also have the chicken run done (baby chicks are all outside), a new mower and tiller (Yay mother's day! and thank you Nana and Pawpaw) in the garage, and we are in the middle of Spring planting (just 1/2 the beans, all the peppers, brussel sprouts, and squashes left to go in when the rain lets up and I can get a new bed tilled). Also looking for some piglets. Dearest is building a pig hut in preparation.

Imagination on Fire

Proof that a dragon flew overhead according to tot. This ice formation was found on the bank to the pond. 

View from the South shore.
Off we go on a muddy muddy hike. We've taken several since this picture was taken. One such hike was to go and introduce ourselves to the elves living in the woods. Tot was very excited to try and free Arthur Spiderwick from captivity, but unfortunately the elves are still distrustful of human folk. She explained this to me on our walk. No worries though, she continued, once they realize that Mama and Blueberry are changlings, really swamp elves, then they will stop hiding. (She's talking to the house brownie in faerie right now......asking him to help her with the toysplosion mess....)

Proof that giants tore through the woods. 

I love hiking with Lil'Bug. 

More Catching Up With Photos

This was our Halloween ensemble a la Lil'Bug. She wanted to be a spider. Then she wanted me to be the web and Blueberry to be the egg sack hanging on the web. It worked out pretty well I think. I used a Mei Tei for the egg sack, stretched webbing over a hula hoop and purchased a spider outfit for the tot.

We went roller skating soon after her birthday. She was not a fan, but had a pretty good time with friends anyway.

We've been building. Lil'Bug asked me to include this picture in the blog. She's just become aware of the blog and is excited, curious, and wants to participate in content. Cool.

Giving Thanks for Food!

Every meal that we say grace Lil'Bug says, when it is her turn, "I AM THANKFUL FOR OUR FOOD!"
I am too.
The last couple weeks I have taken pictures of a couple beautiful food moments.

This is the very successful attempt at preparing a Shank Boil. I altered the recipe just a bit. I used a Dutch Oven, skipped the parsnips, and instead of cooking on the stove top, used my oven at 350 degrees for 3-4 hours. Good stuff. One of the best beef meals that we've done from our grass fed local side of beef, ironically on of the cheapest cuts and I was so nervous about it I set aside the cut with the tongue, heart, and liver. Sooooooo very good.

This is how we roast pumpkin to make pumpkin puree for pies and soups. Under each half is a tablespoon of salted butter.


Beans and ham. Easy. The beans are actually underneath the onions too. This is the heartiest, simple meal I know of. Usually I also add celery, but we were out. Another local mama adds cabbage. I want to try that in the future. The beans soak overnight, the soup cooks all day until the ham falls apart. Even yummier as leftovers and freezes very well.

One random afternoon Aunt Bee showed up bearing these. Tur-oreo-crispins. A play on turduckens of our heritage. She is so cool. I am thankful that I lent her my kids a cookin' cook book. ;)

I am thankful that we eat as well as we do, for less than most families manage, and that we've been blessed to live the life we do. Food is our fuel, how we maintain our bodies and mind, nourish. We thank God for the abundance we are granted, the generosity of friends and family that have helped stocked our pantry this year after our miserable garden output.

May you and yours also be blessed this Thanksgiving and the Thanksgivings following.